12 Signs And Signals You Just Might Be A Crochet-aholic

So far there are 12 signs and signals you just might be a crochet-aholic:

1. You thought your cat ran away but you found him!  There he was, attached to the thritythird potholder you made this week, the darn cat's tail crocheted right into the dang thing!
2. Your children are begging for food.  (That's an easy one, this happens early on in the crochet-aholic's family.  Usually it's the husband begging for dinner first and then progresses into the children begging and actually begging the neighbors for a home cooked meal.)
3. Your husband doesn't bother to kiss you goodbye when he leaves for work in the morning, he's afraid you'll crochet his lips to yours and post it on Ravelry as a project finished off, free pattern download included, sharing it with the one hundred sixty two groups you belong to on Ravelry.
4. The cat really did run away this time.  He left a note on the fridge saying something like "I HATE POWDERED MILK!  If you hadn't made me drink out of that crocheted bowl you made me, I could have had real milk, right from the milk bottle!  POWDERED MILK SUCKS!"    But it's okay that the cat is gone, (and so are the children and husband by now) ...  So the mice haven't left yet!  (You know this because you keep finding little tiny poops in the yarn stash in every corner of every room in the house.  You even found the sweetest thing  you ever saw - four cute,  tiny baby mice in a nest their mother made inside a fat bottom bag you started years ago but never finished.)
5. You haven't seen your sewing room floor in years, it's covered by grocery bags you've been folding neatly and saving to make that plarn bag you keep seeing on the net.  The only thing holding you back from making that plarn bag is that it will stop any excuse you have to go buy more yarn for yet another project.
6. You have frequent flyer miles at Lily's House Of Yarn.
7. The bizarre committee at church asked you to please stop dropping off your crocheted key chains and heart purses, their storage room is full and so is the youth room.  And so is the pastor's office and the nursery.  (I mean, sheesh, it's not like they have to buy them from you, you're donating them for crying out loud!)
8. You're  wondering  if crocheted dinner plates are microwave and dishwasher safe.
9. Your neighbor gives you funny looks whenever you bump into him on your way to Lily's House Of Yarn.  (I mean, r-e-a-l-l-y!  He's just jealous he doesn't  have a crocheted granny square car cover for his station wagon?  Sheesh!)
10.  You've lost twenty pounds in the last month except for your butt, which gained twenty pounds all by itself, all of a sudden, like magic!
11. Your hands are aching and your eye balls are squirtin' but you go on, for the cause, for the Crochet Liberation Front!  Crochet at all cost!  Life or crochet?  I choose crochet!  And on and on you crochet.

And the last sign you might be a crochet-aholic:

12. You're reading "12 Signs And Signals You Just Might Be A Crochet-aholic"

Now go get some help ! (with getting that granny square car cover off the station wagon so you can get to Lily's House Of Yarn!)

the above is purely fictional, of course, and in now way is meant to make fun of 12 stepping or crocheters in general.  It's just for fun.  ~ anitalite ;-)_